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Sunday, August 8, 2010

I'm not a merman, but I am a mere man.

What Goes Through My Head Before a Nap:


"I hate you all! Leave me alone! I'm sick of traveling, and taking trains. I just want to sleep! I don't care anymore!"

The end.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

I wonder...

if our descriptions of the godly person we'd like to meet and be with are actually a spiritualized way of saying we don't want to bear with somebody's weaknesses and sins.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Goals moving forward

I'm about to finally move back to New York. Some things are up in the air. However, these are the simple goals I have.

-Get everything sorted out for grad school; the G.R.E. exam and my Biblical Greek studies.
-Seek out mentors who are much further down the full-time ministry path.
-Seek out mentors and other sources of wisdom regarding both marriage and what a healthy courtship/relationship would look like.
-No dating, through the entire summer.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Everything Runs on Love

Everything runs on love. Love exists eternally between the three Persons of the Godhead and it is the core of what He has made here on the earth.

This love appears in many manifestations; friendship, romance, parenthood, even admiration. And everything runs on love. In our fallen world, the proof is this: watch what happens when love is disrupted. See what happens to children who are without assurance that daddy loves mommy. See that even after 40 years of marriage the husband hates the mention of the wife's old boyfriend. See the pain of the person cheated on. See the deep hurts of those without friends. Disrupt the love and you disrupt the very soul of a person--because everything runs on love. Without love, one doubts whether he or she can continue on in life--or whether they even should.

Despite the sad situation it should be a comfort to know this: That the Object of the greatest love we can experience is also the most perfect of any of the objects of our love--that our most important love relationship is with One who can be utterly trusted, has no wayward past, and has no failings ever, in His love.

In Him, healing happens, and all of the other loves experience restoration. But only in the heart that holds Him as the chief love.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Psalm 46:10

http://realityofchrist.blogspot.com/2010/03/entry-15-psalm-4610.html

Friday, March 12, 2010

Things you must get past...

...in order to be maritally capable. A better title might be, "things I must get past", or "things I have gotten/am getting past". Now this is primarily directed toward other single men like myself who, though capable of attracting the ladies, have held off on really truly pursuing somebody as a marriage partner--out of immaturity. But I suppose it can apply just as much to any girls reading. I am grateful to some preachers who, though I have not met most of them, became mentors to me in this area through their sermons, especially their sermons on marriage, dating, singleness, etc. Those are Paul Washer (see especially "Marriage and the Gospel"), Matt Chandler (especially "Sanctification and Marriage"), and JR Vassar ("Intentional Singleness"). They all deal a lot with young men and are versed in directly confronting their immaturity. They confronted mine. Things are happening.

You must get past all the sensual allurements of the foreign exchange student, the super-energetic hottie whom everybody wants (though she is no less godly than the less-energetic ones), desires for physical perfection (as if you were physically perfect), and you must get past an excessive desire for challenge. This is a cluster of fleshly desire that has kept many a man holding out for the "ultimate". (It turns out God is the ultimate, not some woman!)

I remember watching the movie Tombstone, about a year ago. I'm talking about the one with Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer. Kurt Russell as Wyatt Earp meets this gorgeous woman who sings. And she's quite capable in the area of flirting. In one gripping (for me, at least) scene the two of them (oh, and by the way, Wyatt Earp is married, albeit to a cray lady) are on their horses, and Wyatt (played by Kurt...hmm...) chases her. She says somethng about her horse being in heat, too. I suppose the whole thing is more intentionally provocative than I realized. But it impacted me, and confirmed in my mind that I needed to go out and find that "ultimate" woman and chase her down on my horse and marry her (at that point I was sure she would be found in Arizona, both the setting of the movie and the place I would be living soon). I could only have one wife (sure, Kurt Russell gets two, but I love Jesus). So I needed to pursue the ultimate--even if that meant waiting until I was in the ideal situation for me to do so...perhaps established in some ministry, at a church where I fit in well, giving me all the leverage of confidence and expression necessary. This could take years--but anything for that brilliant, curvaceous, blonde, no wait brunette, no wait blonde, no wait I can't even decide, godly, faithful, loving woman who had somehow also, like me, remained single. Oh, and did I mention the challenge? In the past when a girl I liked suddenly liked me back, and it became obvious, I usually got a little freaked out, and lost interest, and felt guilty about the whole thing, and stopped pursuing. This is because I wanted the "ultimate"--and surely the "ultimate" could not be that easy.

The desire to pursue the ultimate is not from Satan, or our flesh, or our culture. The desire to pursue the ultimate is from God Himself. And God Himself IS the ultimate. This is where I was going wrong. It was all based on self-love and selfishness. I wanted to pursue ultimate pleasure for myself, in things, rather than pursuing ultimate pleasure for myself, mankind, and God through pursuing and enjoying God as supremely valuable over all things. And should I spend my days going home to a supermodel when the world around is perishing? Should I dream of a flawed relationship with a sinful person for a lifetime instead of dreaming of the wonders of eternity and pursuing them? Does that make any sense?

Pursue the true Ultimate and stop trying to find it in a woman (or a man). You will be both healthier and more fit for marriage.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Every Thought Captive

These are wrong thoughts of mine that must be taken captive. I'm writing it here for repeated access. I don't assume that many read this, even out of the 9 people subscribed to this blog. But even if people did read it, I think it may be beneficial.

1) Longings for a "nice life". God does not call us to a nice life. He calls us to deny ourselves and take up our cross if we are to follow Him--not optional! But I have desires for a well-paying, nice and neat ministry position to start after my internship ends. How hollow! True Gospel ministry by nature is not nice and neat anyway. If it is, it's probably more of a plasticy Gospel ministry replica. I visited California this weekend, and southern California is gorgeous in case you did not know. And I thought how nice it would be to be hired out there. Selfishly.

2) My romantic thoughts. The problem with them is that I fail to keep in mind that the only type of woman I have any business with is one in whom God has so worked that she does not need a nice or large house but rather she is willing to sacrifice a nice car and a big ring and a fancy home and exotic European vacations because her true longings are for God and for the benefit of His Church.

Matthew 19:30 But many who are first will be last, and the last first.
Romans 12:16 Associate with the lowly
Matthew 13:44-46 "The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Some beliefs regarding the glory of God

1. The glory (or splendor, or majesty, or awesomeness) of God is infinite. For us as humans this means that God is the perpetual novelty because the wonders of His glory are inexaustable.

2. God is more important than us. He is infinite. All that exists depends on Him.

3. God has been infinitely joyful in the Trinity for all time.

4. All of the true Christian experience is centered on the glory of God. God's acts of salvation, including predestination, are "to the praise of His glory" (see Ephesians 1:5-14) and the process of sanctification is inspired by, powered by, and evidenced by the glory of God (see 2 Cor. 3:18). Thus we can say that "mundane" Christian experience is no Christian experience at all--not because we are "revolutionaries" but because of the ever-present and powerful God in all His glory and splendor and beauty and majesty.

5. God is chiefly concerned about being glorified. This is offensive to many but we must remember that (A) pride is an over-estimation of one's value, which is impossible for God who is infinitely valuable and therefore God's glorifying of Himself is always accurate and true; (B) in His concern for being glorified God has all peoples in mind; if He is glorified, they may know Him, and finally have true joy as they were created to enjoy, and (C) the most important thing any created thing can do is to attest to God's glory.

6. To "glorify God" does not mean that we make Him look better than He is (which is impossible and a blasphemous thought) but rather that we simply help people see Him for who He is. We "magnify" Him more like a telescope and not like a microscope.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Preaching, consecration, and the Word

"Many ministers preach their consecration and try to live the preached Word instead of living their consecration and preaching the Word." - Ed Cole

Monday, February 8, 2010

Use this in children's church

I was building up Goliath as an intimidating figure.

"The Bible actually says he was a 'champion'. Champion of what? I don't know. But when you're that big, you're probably the champion of everything--except hide-and-seek."

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Help! I'm in a nutshell!

How did I get into this very great big nutshell?

Thursday, January 28, 2010

2 for the price of 1

I am failing in the area of self-discipline. I know that I am failing because truths that once we so clear to me, while still "true", are pushed toward the back-burner. I believe God's Word is given as the truth we are meant to live in, and to see played out in everyday life. I have a diminished sense of these truths and realities. And I'm not talking about a couple days of missing devotion time. Rather I have some sense (and I could be wrong) that in an incredibly slow way that cannot simply be fought by means of one lone devotion time, however focused, sincere or sublime it may be. I am thinking more long-term. I am losing the core battle of life, the abs of godly living (when you lift heavy but have undeveloped abs, injuries start to happen). So that needs to change. I don't need one good prayer time. I need to discipline myself. It is not enough to roll out of bed only in time for work, day after day.

Personalities are sacred. Personality tests are very illuminating. They're limited, but still illuminating. Our personalities, in their infinite uniqueness and detail, reflect different aspects of the nature of God. That is why they are sacred. God is intelligent, creative, relational, gentle, unchanging, beautiful, joyful, self-aware, powerful, solid. And some people simply have certain of these qualities more than others do. And in these differences we (especially when restored by the transformation of the Holy Spirit) reflect God's image in different ways.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Yes, yes, yes

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

The necessity of the cross

"All inadequate doctrines of the atonement are due to inadequate doctrines of God and humanity. If we bring God down to our level and raise ourselves to his, then of course we see no need for a radical salvation, let alone for a radical atonement to secure it. When, on the other hand, we have glimpsed into the blinding glory of the holiness of God and have been so convicted by the Holy Spirit that we tremble before God and acknowledge what we are, namely 'hell-deserving sinners,' then and only then does the necessity of the cross appear so obvious that we are astonished we never saw it before." John Stott, The Cross of Christ

Monday, January 18, 2010

Whatever the cost

May I be used to give others a greater sense of the greatness and holiness of God, whatever job or ministry it costs me, whatever friendships it costs me, whatever humiliation it costs me, whatever woman it costs me--He is har too great and too beautiful and too marvelous and too good, and I am far too small, and too temporary, for there to be any other worthy approach to life.

God have mercy on me in order to make this happen.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Pure things

Tonight I saw something beautiful. It was a brief, light, simple and unexpectedly profound exchange that occurred in the middle of a rather routine and mundane task. I don't really know what else to say about it. It was pure and innocent and kind and I think it changed my life. Not for any other reason but that it was an eye-opening, heart-opening little exchange.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Not much

Well, now that the Reality of Christ blog is up and running (and a cool thing in my opinion), I think I will use this old blog of mine, for tonight, to indulge in the strange phenomenon of writing one's deep personal reflections online for all the world to see; an archived practice of early man known as "blogging".

But there isn't much to tell. I just feel strange tonight.

God is incredibly, wondrously great and I look forward to never thinking in anguish again, in His presence. I think a lot. Too much sometimes. What a thought, that my thoughts will one day be in perfect harmony and in perfect joy, with Christ. They will not circle around obsessively, there will be no discontentment to spur my thoughts on needlessly. They will come in health and they will function in health.

If I have a flaw that I know of I will do what I can to correct it. I do this. But then again I am still immature. I realized that even when you grow as a person, you will be at a new level of maturity, and a new person so to speak--one who has a whole new set of things to learn and mistakes to make. But with each new level of maturity and responsibility reached, one can at least rejoice in it. After all, many will live their whole lives without being honest with themselves about whatever you just decided to be honest with yourself about. Aging for them is especially hard. I have all the thickheadedness to end up one of them, but I have the grace of God that teaches me not to.

Sometimes fellowship with friends in Christ feels so good, that I actually almost feel guilty. Talk about a need to retrain one's conscience, and philosophy, and lifestyle!

My heart for Long Island is starting to outweigh my heart for New York City. I heard firstborns are built with a sort of "homing device". Makes sense. We have ducks in our backyard at home. We have all sorts of birds, and we have rabbits. We have rabbits and squirrels that will actually come up to us and be fed by hand. All of this is my mother's doing. They know her; she feeds them.

I have more to learn, but this is my philosophy of dealing with people. Stay 100% committed to God's Word, and keep your heart 100% open to the person--engage them and feel what they feel. Change happens this way. Always remember the disarming power of Christian love. It completely changes the nature of the conversation.

Our generation (young and "cool" people) of Christians has GOT to stop absorbing and even promoting the irreverence of our culture. It is utterly impossible to square with Scripture. That is, if we read it.

For many years, when I thought about marriage and dating and courtship, I thought about compatibility. I thought about what would be the absolute ideal woman for me in every way; looks, personality, etc. And then there was a shift in my thinking. And with that shift came the thought, "Shut up and love one woman well." And I decided that either that's what God was telling me, or it was what he ought to be telling me. Obviously I'm joking by discussing what God "ought" to do.

I will share one thing, though--I decided and told a friend that unless I can say, "There walks a godly woman," I will not pursue that woman romantically.

Would a young woman say of me, "There walks a godly man"?

More importantly, what does God think?

The end.

Friday, January 1, 2010

This other blog...

I have an idea I am very excited about. It's a separate blog that I started 2 weeks ago:

http://realityofchrist.blogspot.com

This blog you are reading now, my main blog, has seen different kinds of postings; poems (one mine and one classic one), journal entries, theological essays, and thoughts on holiness.

My hope for the Reality of Christ blog is to make it different. My hope is for it to become a collaborative effort and for my own entries to be only a fraction of the total postings.

I want the blog (and its readers...and yes, I want it to have readers) to benefit from a spectrum of points of view, just as the body of Christ is comprised of a spectrum of personalities, spiritual gifts, backgrounds, and desires, with the result that we embrace God, His presence, His holiness and His Word with our hearts' affections and with our minds' awareness.